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Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今日圣诞，老猫先祝大家圣诞快乐，虽然是洋人的节日：）下午贾陆英老师继续在老秘网, d3 l& E" [! Z( W! \& C! B" |4 b! Z
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">群“重温经典读书会”49231471辅导我们学习《论语》。贾陆英老师一直记挂着我们这群“大学生”，原本这节课是安排在周三下午的，但贾老师届时另有要事，所以今日上午便特地在群里发出预告，提前到今日下午开课。有此良师，夫复何求？闲话少叙，立即把上课实录整理奉上。. w* W( v: {( \ c1 N+ h
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$ m6 A# e" a" _& \, u) W$ W, k# ~0 _' jmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:#006EFE;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾陆英：! O" t% a* M9 F, \+ b: L
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">今天下午，我们学习讨论《论语》为政篇第* ]! s2 r8 a3 m; \$ ?
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: _4 W4 ~% V. m! `$ f4 V2 Zmso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子问孝，子曰：9 D. i. U9 Q4 m( N
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">无违。$ u* L" i- p6 A, nmso-font-kerning:0pt">”" M5 v5 h9 G+ E- u7 f; A6 F
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟御，子告之曰：6 q k; B+ ^/ J
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问孝于我，我对曰无违。0 w' S) o/ z) Z* Kcolor:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”; t2 T# Z# |1 `& k, J/ i
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">何谓也？# W8 @, I, ~9 N) Y* i
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">子曰：! _$ G7 [9 U1 k* Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">“3 a) F0 R4 N- W& pmso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;$ |4 B" }( K7 s i! |
mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼；死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。2 |0 w3 j. M1 l# m, D
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟懿子：鲁国大夫，三家之一，姓仲孙，名何忌，懿是谥号。他的父亲孟僖子临死时要他向孔子学礼。无违：不要违背礼。樊迟：孔子的学生，名须，字子迟，比孔子小四十六岁。御：驾驶马车。孟孙：指孟懿子。( E% }) d2 _" j% U$ Q* gmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝就是不要违背礼。# y# P9 z, }, B! Q/ I% l; x10.5pt;font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">”9 O" ^8 P, ?9 e% @( }mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;
! c. c6 m6 |, U9 F4 G3 jmso-font-kerning:0pt">一天，樊迟给孔子驾车，孔子告诉他说：9 C5 X+ _, |+ U( P, S7 r( o: G0pt">"0 m1 x7 s6 @5 V! Q9 q4 }
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) r8 l2 `3 w, p: i. [) h# _9 nTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孟孙问我什么是孝，我回答他说不要违背礼。& i$ M! X: @5 w0 Xmso-font-kerning:0pt">"+ @- s+ g: _' s* M. C! u6 P" i3 gfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
2 v) ^% M0 P- H. Z7 a+ J& Hmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">樊迟说：6 s7 w j, L, ]. Y% I; ]* b. Dmso-font-kerning:0pt">"$ {! Z) F4 q0 U7 {
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">这是什么意思呢7 j8 j6 r% }) m
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孔子说：( w. \, I% g. e8 l
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母活着的时候，要按礼侍奉他们；父母死了，要按礼来埋葬他们，祭祀他们。2 I5 e) Q4 V" G7 R! g* @% I; @4 \mso-font-kerning:0pt">"
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：怎样理解孝就是- Z/ {; L, t4 |- V3 X% w: R# U" N7 O
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，就是不要违背父亲的教诲，这是就具体情况所做的回答。但是就普遍事理而言，孔子讲* Z$ y3 m; v0 C k
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">，强调要以礼事亲，不可违背于礼，$ R% |6 L8 O) ]! N
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。6 `" M F6 p: B* ]# E: v) l* Umso-font-kerning:0pt">”8 \$ u% ?0 Q; x. _+ S- r" J) a7 Y: ?font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
7 }# P; O2 G* p% ]4 j8 d; B9 Nmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">父母在世，如有不合乎礼的言行，子女是不应当顺从的，而要以合乎礼的方法劝谏，这是对父母真正的爱护、尊敬。孝的精神，还应当体现在父母去世以后，要按照礼制去安葬他们、祭祀他们，这才算子女尽孝有始有终。5 o. Y. b; y6 ~- l- }% A0 }
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* Q2 u4 d( `) k Z6 |! Dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">问：为什么说以礼事亲才是孝？) ?! l9 L1 \9 T5 R" C' d& E
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+ C1 S) P L( jTahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！反过来说，虽然礼遇有加未必出于心敬，但若是不加礼遇那就一定是心不敬，也就是不孝啦。所以外在的礼对于孝来说很重要，如若无礼那必然是不孝！对父母尽孝道，是义4 d4 l* {9 ?% G& {0 z, [2 m& Rmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝最重要的是心敬，心敬外化出来的表现是礼遇！- B7 h# J& }" P3 T- e, c8 b2 S0 i3 r
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9 Z. O6 z. M k% B3 x4 ^$ I- ymso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">赞同。孝的本质，是发自内心的对父母的恭敬和感恩之情。有此心，才会有孝行。8 N3 e7 K% d6 A' }/ a6 `
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">贾老，昨天晚生正好读到战国时期儒家关于礼、丧、祭的论述1 d% t f+ ^: J# V
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: L8 p# y4 t f+ ]mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。对父母的孝，绝对不能行功利主义，现在社会上很多人在父母有能力的时候，和颜悦色，等到父母年迈无力，不能给自己帮上什么了，就放弃赡养父母，这是一种巧言令色，有所图谋。这三点做到都是不简单的，先说不违，能够做到遵循父母的教导，按照父母意愿行事之人有几？晚生做不到，起码现在说，不孝有三无后为大，父母成天逼婚，依旧违背了。老吾老以及人之老啊* M2 q8 ~. W% T1 z# b. d6 H9 E
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。现在社会中，生前不依礼事亲，死后大操大办的现象很普遍，成为了陋习，也造成了很大的负担。1 U. U. B: d5 {, I
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孝经
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">孝，如今还在于与父母交心、沟通，体谅父母的难处，分担父母的责任。+ ~1 d1 g0 l: [& s* x* r
mso-font-kerning:0pt">——8 b+ q. _0 [' @% {font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
9 R- G" `/ K {0 Ymso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对，这是从情感上关心父母，是尽孝的重要内容。生，事之以礼。死，葬之以礼，祭之以礼。 `, i: q7 h+ R5 W# y9 kmso-font-kerning:0pt">——9 ^/ d. n0 ~- v* E) b
font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
2 {8 Y; ^& A h4 H3 l \/ H: Dmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">对父母的孝道，是义。如何尽孝，是礼。如何行礼，就是生而不违，去世行丧礼，祭祀行祭礼。《孝经》说：4 V$ \$ r. U* g' nmso-font-kerning:0pt">“. i' E' t6 k4 e' k. s
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$ d4 g- l$ y3 K. {" N) Y+ Lmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼者，敬而已矣。故敬其父，则子悦；敬其兄，则弟悦；敬其君，则臣悦；敬一人，而千万人悦。所敬者寡，而悦者众，此之谓要道也。* S, L. {7 e. Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">”5 H- a# H& Y- E$ V6 N* X0 B
font-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;, J: `1 X( w, S; w: {1 i: ?
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">礼的内在依据是孝悌，而外在表现，就是一个; Y6 x8 n" _- @/ M
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9 [- Q, g; j( L; I5 I& _+ ?' kmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">敬7 F( O8 g4 O" l( Cmso-font-kerning:0pt">”" P& J! ?, \! M8 ^& rfont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;
) Q0 E% G9 J {* M: V7 Fmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">字。所以，如能尊敬他的父亲，那么其儿子就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的兄长，那么其弟弟就会喜悦；如能尊敬他的国君，那么其臣下就会喜悦。尊敬的是一个人，却能使千万人喜悦。所敬者虽然只是少数，而喜悦的人却有千千万万，这就是为什么把推行孝悌之道和礼乐教化称为7 g8 Y% X5 C) _6 `3 b o
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! y" M+ t6 ^6 Zmso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">要道) M- O: c+ o! {6 n9 jmso-font-kerning:0pt">”! T) c8 L3 S( r( t. o# V8 Ofont-family:宋体;mso-ascii-font-family:Tahoma;mso-hansi-font-family:Tahoma;6 j4 U o" p) f* x; |: L
mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">的意义所在啊。0 v. U8 n q3 b7 a$ [. L1 imso-font-kerning:0pt">
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Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">嗯，这就是不孝有三的第一种。事谓阿意曲从，陷亲不义，一不孝也。我们通常将的孝顺的( Z$ M( G$ K+ U
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mso-bidi-font-family:Tahoma;color:black;mso-font-kerning:0pt">其实就是不违的意思- N7 s/ [! w3 X8 I3 Wmso-font-kerning:0pt">
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